Is Anger Ruining Your Life?
Modern day living seems to trigger a lot of ANGER in people - have you ever noticed that? You hear the horror stories all the time: road rage, fights, riots, senseless violent crimes . . . We don't need to dwell on it here, we see enough of it every day!
But have you ever wondered, why are we as a people so angry? Are we just wired that way, or are there other factors at work? Do you personally ever feel angry for no apparent reason? Does your anger often get out of control so you say and do things you later regret?
Most of the time, there are underlying pressures that cause us to explode in anger at the slightest provocation.
"Hot Button" Triggers
Each of us has certain issues that "set us off" - things like rude people, heavy traffic, hurtful comments by a spouse or co-worker, financial pressure, and so on.
But sometimes the rage seems to bubble up from within us even when nothing outward has happened to trigger it. Most often when this happens, you are reacting to an inner trigger, perhaps an old memory or random thought that triggered negative emotions within you.
There's no doubt about it; anger can destroy your life if you don't get it under control.
But HOW do you get it under control? What do you do with all of those negative emotions that threaten to overwhelm you?
There are two good techniques I know of that are effective in reducing the intensity of anger, and eventually can neutralize it all together:
Forgiveness
This one is especially effective when you feel angry at a specific person (even if that person is yourself). Simply set aside time each day or evening and focus on this person (or yourself) and say over and over, "I forgive you, (name). What you did was wrong, but I am ready to let go of it so it doesn't continue to control my life. I forgive you and I'm moving on now."
Note that your forgiveness is not the same thing as CONDONING the hurt someone has caused you; it's a decision to move PAST it. Also, this technique needs to be used regularly to work effectively - don't expect your feelings of anger to dissolve instantly.
Acceptance
This technique is better for a SITUATION you feel angry about, not necessarily a person. Spend time each day accepting it. Perhaps you feel powerless and frightened about a particular situation, and that makes you feel angry and frustrated. For this kind of situation, usually if you stop resisting the reality of what's happening and instead just accept it for what it is, you will find that your anger dissipates. You could write or speak something like this to get the ball rolling: "This _______ situation (money, relationship, health, etc.) has me feeling very scared, and really MAD! It makes me so angry that I can't do anything to change it, but that anger isn't going to help either. So I accept it for now. I'm going to stop fighting it and surrender, and let go of trying to change it. I let go now."
Again, you may have to do this a few times to notice any relief - but it definitely works to help you feel more calm and centered.
Remember most of all that anger is often a HABIT, just like positive thinking is a habit, and any other emotional state can become a habit too! To change your emotional habits, you need to expend a bit of effort at first, but in a short period of time you start noticing improvement. Keep up with it! Anger can ruin not only your life, but your health and inner peace too!
Today's Quote:
"There are two ways of meeting difficulties: you alter the difficulties, or you alter yourself to meet them." - Phyllis BottomeWise Words:
When you take control of your anger and learn how to process it in healthy ways, life becomes MUCH more joyful and meaningful! Your interactions with others become easy, productive and pleasant. Even when minor annoyances pop up, you simply shrug and dismiss them, no longer feeling like they are worth getting upset over.
That's the sign of a happy, healthy mind! :-)
Your body benefits from reduced anger too! Lower blood pressure, calmer nerves, fewer stress hormones flooding your body all day long - you just FEEL better, and life becomes easier.
If you think you may need some help controlling your anger, I highly recommend the Lose the Rage hypnosis program by hypnotherapist Steve G. Jones. He's got a lot of proven techniques that really work in diffusing anger and providing better coping strategies for life's inevitable anger-producing events!
Learn more here:
http://www.wingsfortheheart.com/lose-the-rage.html
